That's right. Effective immediately, please update your bookmarks to http://www.thebitterwaiter.com.
In honor of the new URL and new layout (with even more changes to come, folks), I thought I'd re-post the entry that started it all many moons ago. Here it is, numero uno, in all its infinite glory.
September 14, 2007
Bitter, party of 2,252,000
People frequently ask why my bitterness is so acutely pronounced. I know why, and it's not because I was made fun of on the playground. It has nothing to do with thoughtless ex-lovers. I don't even blame my jaded resentfulness of humanity on my religious upbringing.
No, the culprit of my animosity and ill-will is the accumulation of more than 10 years in the restaurant business. And thanks to a recent study by the U.S. Department of Labor, showing that more than 2,252,000 Americans earn livings as waiters and waitresses, I know I'm not alone.
It's not so much that I'm tired of serving people; It's that I'm tired of serving stupid people...rude people...cheap people...loud people...obese people...mean-spirited people...difficult people...condescending people...creepy people...stereotypical people...people with bad taste...dishonest people...particular people...people with a massively unjustified sense of entitlement...and people with screaming children.
As a result, I've become a vigilante at work, seeking to right the wrongs of the ignorant while still maintaining my job. You won't read about me spitting in food (save one trip down memory lane that involves pissing on a chicken, but we'll save that for a blogging session when Mr. Grey Goose is a guest author) or getting into a fist fight.
No, the only thing I'll be serving here is tenacious wit with a side of sarcasm and some cutting remarks for dessert.
Be careful, this plate is hot.
Cheers, comrade! You speak quite eloquently for us all! :)
Posted by: Dani Marten | November 18, 2011 at 10:02 AM
Yeah, well, I've hunted bears! And believe me the bears aren't thankful at all! Ungrateful bastards! Neither are the people who buy the bear skins! Fuckers! I've waited tables and that's got jack on being a bear hunter, I should know since I've done both! Sorry. I, much like the previous poster, just couldn't help but attempt to relate to you while informing you of how much worse off *I* am... Oh, and I'm looking forward to the new changes, whatever they are.
Posted by: April | August 10, 2010 at 10:09 PM
Maybe you should add "ugly people" to that list. x
Posted by: Mel | July 31, 2010 at 06:29 PM
So would you say you are genuinely a misanthrope?
I have never been jazzed about people but it is more to do with base human nature,which I think is shit.
I have worked aqs a waitress so know what you mean,but I have also worked as a nurse which is a far more thankless and degrading profession.
I could slip a hypodermic needle into someone with such skill no one couldn't feel it. Because I was sensitive to how many people fear needles[as I did not like them]...but when they were assholes I was more heavy handed. :)
And when they'd cry out at the jab, I'd smile sweetly and say, 'Oh sorry. Did that hurt?'
Sometimes, people just need a lil' jab.
Posted by: ubermouth | July 27, 2010 at 05:42 PM