Hello out there in homebound land. It's somewhere between Sunday and Saturday, January and December, the beginning and the end. After nearly three weeks at home, out of work, and fully stocked up on booze, I'm crawling out of my cocoon to return to this, my first ever writing project, my creative zenith, and my beloved safe space.
How are you? I hope you're numbing out the anxiety and fear by mostly positive means, but also with booze, unless you're sober, in which case now is DEFINITELY not the time to fall off the wagon.
I digress. Fuck, all this post will be is digressing.
While I'll never apologize for the decade+ of bitching about horrible people, I've learned a great deal about myself and others in this pervasively quiet and introspective time. I miss work, I miss being on my feet, I miss a job that demands you multitask in the moment without thinking neither back nor too far ahead. Aside from screaming "GOD THAT ASSHOLE AT TABLE 34 WAS A REAL MOTHERFUCK TONIGHT!" on the drive home, I never had to "take work home." I'm grateful for a job that always gave me minimally taxed cash in hand at the end of every single shift. I see all those missed opportunities for gratitude that I'll never again take for granted.
What I don't miss won't surprise you, but it's now through a more scrutinous lense. All those people, over all those many years, in countless restaurants, whose true colors revealed themselves in every irrational request, every imperious insult, every measure of degradation - I hope you are stewing in a social distancing of your own misery. I hope you see that all those high maintenance demands that seemed so dear and so validating reveal themselves as empty appendages of your own ego and entitlement. I hope you appreciate all those lowly people who did all those things you should have been able to do for yourself - prepare your food, do your laundry, run your errands, raise your children. More so, I hope when and if this all returns to normal, that you allow this universally humbling experience to imbue you with gratitude for people who are trying to make a living far less than yours.
Because if you don't, many others will. And your 1980's days of greed and ego met their maker when people realized how unimportant you are, those of you who make a lot of money and expect it to equate your worth. If you don't learn something from this, I will summon my strength and find a way to be an even bigger bitch. I will call you out with even more ire and venom, because this nation isn't formed on the backs of the rich. It's bolstered by the people who don't mind hard work. And you will learn to appreciate us.